Day 118: Why Comparing Yourself to Others Keeps You Stuck

She said, “The most difficult part for me is that I don’t know what the other designers are doing. It’s hard to plan when you don’t know what you’re planning against.”


And I just sat there for a second.


My mind immediately went to that Kevin moment from Home Alone.


What in the world?


Why would someone skilled enough to be competing against top designers on TV think the way to win is by seeing what everyone else is doing?


Instead of trusting her own vision.


That thought comes from somewhere.


It’s that quiet place that says, “Maybe I’m not enough on my own.”


But you don’t compete with anyone but yourself.


You bring your best.


And you keep growing.


That’s how you move forward.

Not by trying to figure out someone else’s approach and adjusting yourself to match it.

This shows up in so many areas of life.

It’s like looking outside yourself to decide what your life should look like.

Instead of getting clear on what you want and creating from there.

When I was starting out, I wasn’t trying to be Wayne Dyer or Tony Robbins.

I couldn’t be them.

And they couldn’t be me.

We all have our own combination of experiences, interests, and things we’ve studied over time.

That mix is what makes you who you are.

No one else has it.

That’s not arrogance.

That’s just truth.

Somewhere along the way, many of us were taught to downplay that.

To not stand too firmly in who we are.

But there’s nothing wrong with owning it.

Your life experience matters.

The things you’ve been drawn to learn matter.

The way you see the world matters.

For me, this has been more than 4 decades of studying personal growth, spirituality, nutrition, the mind-body connection, and human behavior.


Everything I’ve lived has been filtered through that lens.


That shapes how I see things.


And it shapes how I help.


Everyone has their own version of that.


Those designers all had the same houses to work with.


But every result was different.


Because each person brings something different to the table.


So why compare?


Why assume you’re at a disadvantage unless you know what someone else is doing?


You’re not here to do what they’re doing.


You’re here to do what you do.


In your way.


There may be people who appear to do something similar to you on the surface.


But that’s where the similarity ends.


There is no one with your exact combination of life, perspective, and passion.


That matters more than anything else.

Today’s Gentle Practice

Take a quiet moment today.


Notice where you’ve been comparing yourself to someone else.


Even in a small way.


Then gently ask yourself:

“What would it feel like to come back to my own way of doing this?”


Not better.

Not worse.

Just yours.


Take a breath.


And notice what shifts when you return to yourself.

If this brought something up for you, you can hit reply and tell me where you’ve been comparing yourself lately.

With you,

Lynn