Day 270: Fewer Choices, More Enjoyment
In a text conversation with a friend, he mentioned that he was really enjoying football this year.
He no longer has access to every game and he thinks that might be why.
Because of the limited access he is reading up on the game beforehand and paying more attention to the live coverage pregame show.
He had been concerned about how badly he would miss being able to watch any game he wanted to.
And then he said something that made me stop. He said football life was better than he expected not having access to every game.
At first it just made me smile and I thought, 'focus'. He's actually focused on what's in front of him now.
I thought about that text and its larger significance a lot in the last few days. To the point where I'm sharing it with you now.
It has larger implications in our lives.
We think more choices is always better. But is it?
What if more choices just means more distractions?
It creates the inability to focus or fully enjoy anything.
With the football, in the past it's possible he was never fully focused on a game because it was too difficult to do a deep dive on several games he would be watching.
Also, while he was watching one game he was wondering if another game could be more exciting and should he switch. Was he missing out on watching a better game by watching this one?
That is something we encounter in every area of our lives. Always wondering if we are watching/doing/being the wrong thing and something better is just one click away.
How can we be 100% in if we're always worried about missing out on something better?
Limiting his choices, even not by choice, has increased enjoyment.
Interesting.
Just like getting rid of all the options and just choosing something and then focusing on it.
Focus, but also pruning, or subtraction.
Letting go of what isn't meant for you and focusing on what is.
Also limiting choices by releasing and letting go.
Right now I have three shovels sitting outside. I only need one. So I'll choose the shape and size that works best for me and give the other two back to the people who gave them to me.
That sounds like such a small thing, but it's not. Every extra thing asks something of us. It asks to be stored, moved, cleaned, managed, chosen between, or thought about.
How much more could you be enjoying your life if there wasn't so much stuff in it?
That's the beauty of habits, routines, and rituals.
Steve Jobs wore the exact same color/style t-shirt every day.
Others do the same thing to keep the choices simple. They are high performance individuals and they don't need one more choice to make each day.
I wear flip flops year round, mostly I go between 2 pairs depending on the color I'm wearing that day.
I wear tank tops most of the year, then short sleeve t-shirts , and in the small amount of time it gets cold, long sleeves. I have the same leggings in shorts, mid-length and long. Same brand.
When I wear one color for videos today, it goes to the back and I know which one I'm wearing tomorrow. I don't have to think about it.
Now I'm wondering if I can get logo shirts made in black and white to make the choices even easier.
Just less to think about so I can focus my thoughts on what really matters.
Same with having a morning routine or a bedtime routine.
We don't always realize how much energy we spend deciding.
What to wear, eat, watch. keep, answer, check, think about next.
And every choice may seem small, but all those small choices add up.
Fewer choices can lead to a happier life and a more relaxed mind, which also means a more relaxed nervous system.
Your nervous system feels safer when it knows what is going to happen. It can relax into the rituals.
That doesn't mean life has to become boring or overly controlled.
It means we can stop making ourselves decide about things that don't really matter so we have more energy for the things that do.
That's part of the beauty of subtraction.
It gives us our attention and enjoyment back. It lets us be with the thing in front of us instead of wondering if something better is happening somewhere else.
That's where life starts to feel richer.
Not because we have every option, but because we're finally present enough to enjoy the one we chose.
Today's Gentle Practice
Think about one area of your life where you have too many choices.
Ask yourself:
What choice could I remove so I can enjoy what is in front of me more fully?
It might be something small.
A drawer.
A meal.
A morning decision.
A show.
A routine.
A pile of things you keep moving around.
Notice where choice has become clutter.
Then see what happens when you give yourself fewer options and more room to be present.
With you,
Lynn
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